Make Millennials Like Helicopter Parenting

Do You Raise Narcissistic Children?

Many people wonder if modern parenting practices are more conducive to the development of narcissistic children than earlier parenting practices. This is a good question because the cultural definitions of "effective parenting" change across generations.

The current trend of "helicopter parenting" can definitely create difficulties for children as they grow up. It seems that parenting styles swing back and forth like a pendulum across generations. The "hippie parents" of the 60s and 70s raised the yuppies of the 80s and 90s, and now the yuppies appear to have rebelled against the "peace-out" generation and raised offspring who often look to their parents to fight their struggles when they encounter obstacles or hurdles in their life. It's like generations are kicking back against their own parents' style in raising children.

There was also an intense focus on promoting children's self-esteem. Unfortunately, some children do not receive healthy or constructive feedback that would enable them to become persistent, self-sufficient adults. I sometimes joke with the staff who report to me by reminding them that "not everyone gets a pony". Unfortunately, many aspiring and young adults have been brought up to believe that everyone deserves a trophy and that every effort, no matter how half-heartedly or half-heartedly, is commendable.

It is important to ensure that children are "happy" or "feel good" or "feel loved", but educating them to believe that they should always be the focus of attention and that praise that is deserved, even when it is not earned, is not beneficial to an individual or a society.

Are Millennials Really Different from Other Generations?

It is doubtful that Millennials are the first generation to experience a sense of entitlement and “specialty”, but they are the first generation to be fully immersed in social media from a very young age. Parents have kept family photo albums for generations. Home videos and VCRs made it easy to catalog every developmental milestone in your children. After Myspace and Facebook entered the picture, people could now catalog and highlight their own worldly or great experiences in life. Even if you create a GooglePlus or Linkedin page for career development, you are still creating a constructed identity that is meant to attract the attention and recognition of others.

Posting what you had for breakfast or letting people know that you went to the basement to wash your clothes - and getting “likes” for those experiences - created a whole new taste of narcissism. Never before have humans been able to radiate a certain personal identity that was so far-reaching. A personal "area" or "page" gives the individual the place where he feels that what he is doing matters on a larger scale than it actually warrants, and that elements of small personal matters have greater importance than they actually could.

Post a picture or it didn't happen

The phrase "post a picture or it didn't happen" creates the belief that our identities and experiences are not only "proof" of our greatness, but also "worth archiving". There is a false sense of importance and relevance beyond the close circle of friends / family. Selfies and selfie sticks are testament to the narcissistic twist that contemporary culture has made possible.

In essence, millennials have often been encouraged to believe that their feelings, achievements, preferences, and experiences are more important to others than they probably do or should. Just because you have a great web presence doesn't necessarily mean you are as great as you are Project You are.

Where is the "Adultier Adult"?

Is there a handbook for raising children that demonstrates humility and self-sufficiency? As with every genre of books, there is "Well"Books and"BadBooks. It is important for parents to realize that not a single book will teach you everything there is to know about parenting. The parents of the generation who hugged Elvis Presley felt their children were out of control. Parents of the hippie generation could not "control" these teenagers. It is only natural for parents to be rebelled by their children. Then the harsh realities of adulthood are usually the force that helps rebellious teenagers transform into mature adults. Unfortunately, it now appears that millennials are delaying the transition to independent adulthood for much longer than previous generations.

It is no longer uncommon for parents to call or email college professors to complain about their children's grades or to explain why a child was late on an assignment. Parents are often happy to have their twenty live at home while looking for a first job or working to find a better paying career position. There are many parents who pay the rent for their children in their mid-twenties who want to live alone in pseudo-independence. For some parents, the millennial generation mindset allows them to continue to feel needed. They can also put off their own feeling of aging if they still have "children" in the house. It is as if everyone, not just children, is looking around the room for the "adult" to take care of the situation for them.

"Responsive Parenting" vs. "Suppressive Parenting"

Raising children is not an easy task in a world where there are so many possibilities and possibilities. Parents feel that they are helping their children by engaging in “all aspects of parenting”. Without teaching their children how to make informed decisions, they prepare a young adult to face unexpected and much greater difficulties in the long run. The difference between responsive parenting and oppressive parenting is often only understood by parents when their children are unable to find their way through life independently.

Parents need to remember that a child can never fly if they are never allowed to test their wings.

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